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Listen Louder, Talk Quieter

Today I ventured out of the house for the first time all weekend and went to Trimble Park, one of the state parks associated with big Lake Apopka. It is absolutely gorgeous and tranquil, couldn't believe I didn't do it sooner.

Since Bradley took this position, I've been a little apprehensive about going out on my own. I really wanted to do things besides watch Friends reruns but I was honestly scared to. I am proud of myself for doing this today. It may seem like such a measly step to some but for me, it's huge. Luckily, I live for my own opinions and not others. It is definitely a difficult feat to step out of your comfort zone. To go from always relying on your mate for everything and suddenly, you have to be independent. But I've achieved so much in the last two years as far as branching out. People may not understand it, but frankly, it is not for them to.

I have always been a very social person, always jabbering on and never really thinking of the big picture. The older I get, the more observant I become, and the more I've learned that some times it is okay to be different and I've learned more about myself than I ever thought I would. With Brad's help, I've gained a new perspective. I no longer feel the need for approval and I feel confident in the decisions I've made. A year ago, I felt thst had to be with people, now I have come to find I don't really find much in common with such people.

During these last two weeks, I've traveled to Gainesville to watch my favorite team play with a friend and learned that I should rely on my instincts more. I am always so concerned about what people think and to be honest, it has made me dependent on society. As I am blogging this, I'm sitting next to the lake and listening to the animals that call this place home. They don't care about how many people read this, they won't see my photos and hope they get likes. I am in their home, I am a guest here.

I guess all this rambling simply comes down to this, in this temporary home we live in I want to make the best of every day and experience the most I can. I vow to myself to continue to grow and step out of my comfort zone, to better myself. I vow to Christ to remember the blessings He's given me and to continue to look to Him during all times, not just the hard ones. I vow to Brad to continue to be his support system and have our future in mind. I vow to my family to value our time because tomorrow is never promised. I guess I just realized that I haven't really been living. Thankfully for me, it isn't too late to begin. This next year holds so much promise for me and for us, I can't wait!

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